Why The Mental Load Matters To Your Career!

#MomsSelf-Care #MentalLoadStress #MomsGrowth #MomsDevelopment

“Instead of arriving to work fresh I’ve been up for 4 hours, changed 2 poop diapers, brought one kid to camp, the other to daycare and feel successful if I managed not to leave my gym bag with one of the kids and have taken the baby’s bottle bag with me to work. I arrive to court at 9:00 am and I feel as though I’ve already slayed a dozen dragons! With any luck, there isn’t unidentified goop on my suit.”

The mental load is damaging the relationship to career for 62% of over 200 surveyed Moms*.   Many feel distracted, disengaged and hollowed out juggling work demands and everything-household.  After fighting for years to establish our professional selves, the double-bind of it all crushes the spirit and pulls the same precious energy needed to problem solve and innovate.  Essential skills to thrive in most careers.

There are limits to human attention and working memory.   If you’re paid for strategic solutions or deliver creative output, the mental load’s insistent tug competes for that cognitive space and presence.

“I could have lost my job about 2 years ago.  The stress was so bad from taking care of home and work…I was paralyzed with fear of doing it wrong.  I was diagnosed with ADHD (got meds for that) increased (my) anxiety and depression meds and started seeing a counselor.  That helped, but shortly after that I got pregnant with my second set of twins.” Continue reading “Why The Mental Load Matters To Your Career!”

Dinner Blueprint: My Family’s Menus Week of September 16th

#MomsDinnerHacks #MomsSavingTime #LessDishesForMommy #KidFriendlyFood #OneMealForTheWholeFamily

Every year it’s a big emotional shift to move into fall…. this is not because I don’t like fall, I do…I just don’t like what comes after fall.  I’m that person who is always cold, shivering all year round, hovering under heavy sweaters at the office and still wearing my down coat well into May.  After a long impatient wait, when the average temperature is somewhere north of 80 degrees Fareneheit I’m completely in my element.

There are, however, two things about fall I really look forward to 1. fall cooking and 2. fall baking.

I’m just getting geared up for it all now.   Continue reading “Dinner Blueprint: My Family’s Menus Week of September 16th”

Don’t Hide In the Bathroom! How To Build Your Network & Control Your Destiny

#MomsSelf-Care #MomsCareerHacks #MomsGrowth #MomsDevelopment

“…At first I thought I was in the wrong job, it was very stressful and male dominated. Then, after changing jobs, I thought…well it must be (that I’m in) the wrong country and I moved to Europe!  Then, I considered perhaps I was in the wrong line of work.  It turns out, I love my line of work!  It took an ‘a-ha’ moment to realize the panic attacks and unhappiness that prompted me to keep quitting jobs was about how I was doing the work.”

I nodded, smiling as I listened to Morra Aarons-Mele, self-described ‘work/life rebel’ explain starting her own business.  “I didn’t want office politics, the BS… Continue reading “Don’t Hide In the Bathroom! How To Build Your Network & Control Your Destiny”

Attention Working Moms, Live Happier & Healthier! Book Review for ‘Drop the Ball’ by Tiffany Dufu

 

#MomsSelf-Care #FixWorkingMomStress #MomsCareerHacks #MomsGrowthHacks

There’s a common refrain among the Moms I meet, the juggle of work and life is straining the fragile infrastructure we’ve cobbled together.  After an extended time managing way-too-much, it’s clear the solution goes beyond clever prioritization.   If you’ve felt pressure from wanting to pour all of your presence into those beautiful little people you’re raising while also managing a household and nurturing the career you’ve primed with years of effort, this book is for you. Continue reading “Attention Working Moms, Live Happier & Healthier! Book Review for ‘Drop the Ball’ by Tiffany Dufu”

Boost Happiness & Tame The Mental Load With Radical Self-Care

#MomsWeighIn #MomsSelf-Care #DitchTheInvisibleWorkLoad #Part2MentalLoadSurveyResults

Whether it’s hunched over the smartphone to block playground sunshine, pushing a stroller with one hand and fielding texts with the other or frantically muting grocery store noise during conference calls, Moms are working feverishly to fit ‘everything’ in.

Despite the slickest list-making, to-do-tackling tech out there, the volume and breadth of responsibilities that fall to most Moms – from salary negotiations to scheduling play dates — spills onto the mental list…competing with every other thought in our working memory.

The mental energy required to plan and track the logistics of modern households, drives the ‘mental load’ a persistent source of overwhelm for 98% of surveyed Moms.¹

“I’m short and snippy with others. I’m broody and just unhappy. I’m pissed at my husband and everyone around me because it’s all my burden to deal with and everyone else seems perfectly oblivious…” Continue reading “Boost Happiness & Tame The Mental Load With Radical Self-Care”

Channel Your Inner Pastry Chef & Save Time On Back-To-School Snacks

#MomsFoodHacks #MomsSavingTime #SnackPackHacks #EasingTheBackToSchoolJuggle

My son looked at me…his eyes opened wide and then his eyebrows stretched up, the perfect semi circles seemed to reach his hairline, as he chewed slowly.  The expression on his little face kept changing and his mouth moved more quickly.  He stopped briefly…looked into my eyes, then down at the sticky mess in his hand before smiling.  Outlined with frosting, it was the widest, most surprised and openly joyful smile I’d seen on his tiny face.

I breathed deeply…smiling at the beauty of his reaction. I was elated Continue reading “Channel Your Inner Pastry Chef & Save Time On Back-To-School Snacks”

Stop Stopping! Skill Up & Live Your Vision.

#MomsGrowthHacks #MomsLearnNewSkills #MomsReinvention #MomsCareerGrowth

“Come on in…” I walked tentatively into the doorway, past the tarp and froze as I watched the half-dozen contractors, busily hammering and moving large pieces of equipment across the floor.  I was motioned inside by a man wearing a toolbelt, “It’s okay, Jenn’s downstairs…just be very careful.” He smiled.  Noted.  As I made my way down the narrow staircase, I had a chance to (finally) meet Jenn Mason, Entrepreneur, cheese expert, supermom and today, hands-on construction project manager. Continue reading “Stop Stopping! Skill Up & Live Your Vision.”

Beyond Burnout. How The Mental Load Affects Moms & What You Can Do About It!

#MomsWeighIn #MomsSelf-Care #TameTheInvisibleWorkLoad

Postcards From The Isle of Overwhelm  

98% of the Moms surveyed* feel stress from carrying the mental load, the always-on invisible to-do list that results from the ‘everything household and kids’ oversight handled by Mom in most families.

 When asked ‘how do you know you’ve reached a point of burnout?’ the effects are felt everywhere – from a perpetually bad mood, impatience with children and loved ones, to hives and headaches.

  • 22% can tell by their change in mood
  • 21% of Moms notice changes in behavior
  • 7% experience physical changes as a result of mental load stress
  • And half (50%) experience some combination of all three.

“I leave my phone in the fridge. I know I ate lunch- but I forgot what I ate. Wait…did I really eat lunch? I find myself more short-tempered…yelling and frustrated. I’m typically very objective and non-emotional. Essentially, I’m pulled away from the core of who I am.” Continue reading “Beyond Burnout. How The Mental Load Affects Moms & What You Can Do About It!”

Quiet That Inner Voice & Make Time To Follow Your Passions!

#MomsGrowthHacks #MomsSelf-Care #MomsGettingImportantStuffDone

“Live as though your life depends on it. Today is critically important. After all, life is just a series of todays.” She looked at me unflinchingly as she said it. I paused… then nodded as I thought about the weight and beauty of her perspective.

Rethinking how to navigate your todays, based on life’s fragility, needn’t feel gloomy. Discussing April’s outlook and zeal for designing a life of intention radiates optimism.

A trained psychologist and healthcare researcher, she’s had a direct view into life’s impermanence and how people faced with terminal conditions assess choices they’ve made. “At the end of their time, people regret not seeing family, not taking risks or trying things.”

Noted. She had my full attention within the first 30 seconds of our call.

Who wouldn’t want greater presence with family, the pursuit of passion projects and personal growth? Continue reading “Quiet That Inner Voice & Make Time To Follow Your Passions!”

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