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Ease your Work/Life Decisions and Choose What you Really Value

“If I have an important call during a time when my daughter is going to be in a play, I weigh the emotional cost not just the financial one. She only performs once a year and me being there is extremely important. If it’s an important meeting, like a board meeting then I’ll ask, ‘can we reschedule it? Do I need to be there for the whole time? Can I send my team member if I prepare that person?’ So, if I cannot change the meeting, I try to make the right choice and in this case it’s my daughter.” Said Edwine Alphonse, Finance Leader, Investor and Entrepreneur.

Career growth with kids looks different. It’s intense, stretching and logistically maddening at times. But amidst the chaos something magical happens. You don’t just become more senior; you become a dot-connecting-soothsayer and see opportunities others don’t.

Your ambition may not fit in the same career container anymore. Many of us start to crave transformation along with new challenges, meaning, flexibility or income. So how do you keep learning, growing and empire building, when your kids continue to evolve and need more?

Optimize and Prioritize for Multiple Roles

Edwine views events in life and business through the lens of an accountant. She calculates, assesses and recognizes hidden value and liabilities. “I am a mom to two amazing girls and that’s my number one role but I’m also a wife, daughter, sister and friend. My unpaid roles are the ones I value the most because they’re priceless to me so, I try to fulfill all of them.”

Although she acknowledges the demands, she’s embraced her many commitments. “The role I get paid for is to be a financial leader. I also coach and mentor young professionals and family members. So, I see myself as uplifting and supporting others while learning to support myself.”

Choices Have Different Financial and Emotional Value

There are a series of investments with our time and money that change through each life season. When I asked, how often do you determine what’s working? Edwine said. “I ask myself, ‘does this make sense?’ every quarter and sometimes there’s a financial way to do it and there’s an emotional way. The financial way, is ‘would I rather spend one hour working on a project than cleaning my home?’ That’s an easy one; I would rather do work on a project and make 5 or 6 times the money I’m paying my cleaning lady per hour. But sometimes it’s emotional.“

Weigh Your Opportunity Costs

We often drown in the decisions and micro-choices that define each day but having a clear sense of what’s values aligned or high priority helps. Edwine said, “I think about the opportunity costs. Like, ‘does it make sense for me to spend time working on this?’ And it’s not just the possibility of money now. It could be in the future because I’m building a relationship or network.”

Revisit Your Needs Frequently

Our children’s discretionary activities grow right along with them, and the pace can feel relentless. Edwine said, “If there’s a networking event during soccer practice for the kids, then it doesn’t make sense for me to sacrifice it because they have 20 practices per month. If I miss one, it’s no problem. I ask myself, ‘what am I losing and what am I gaining?’ and I do this assessment quarterly.”

When Your Systems Break Get Creative

We also discussed what it means for something to be “good enough?” An internal battle that’s hard to win. Edwine said, “We carry a lot of guilt as parents and especially as mothers.” In part one from our interview, we discussed this balance. And as we all know, even the very best infrastructure can and will break.

She explained, “Sometimes, I cannot find childcare and when I can’t find anything, I reach out to my parents or in laws. And that takes a lot for me to do because I don’t like to ask for help. But I’ve learned to say, ‘mom can I fly you in to stay for a couple of days because I’m traveling for work?’ I will also ask friends if I’m stuck in a meeting and need someone to pick up the kids.”

Ask for Help and Extend it to Others

It takes some vulnerability to curate and engage with your village. Often, that trust needs to be there to share mistakes or needs without fear of reprisal. Edwine said, “I ask for help now because as they say, ‘if you want to go somewhere far you cannot go alone.’ You need people to help and support you. I also make myself available for other people because they are making themselves available for me. If they have issues, I’ll say ‘you can leave your daughter here because I work from home. I’m not guaranteeing entertainment the whole time, but I can give her some arts and crafts to do.” Beautiful!

Add Your Unique Spark to any Career

In high school, when Edwine told her parents she wanted to be a writer, they encouraged stability over creativity. Which is common for many of us from immigrant families. Edwine said, “I tend to be extremely pragmatic. So 25 years ago, when I was looking for what would guarantee me a job, accounting was at the top of that list because everyone needs to file taxes at some point.”

She now sees that writing is part of her job and she’s expanded it. “The funny thing is, I write statements and financial history all of the time. Now, I’m also more creative with my newsletter so, whatever line of work you’re in you can still write and enjoy your work.”

Make Your Self-Care Multifaceted

Edwine said, “I’m still learning how to invest in self-care because I like to work and am always thinking about it. Self-care is being able to read the news and creatively interpret it and share it. It’s also going for a 20-minute walk with my dog after I drop off the kids at school. If it’s cold, then I get on my Peloton bike to exercise so, I like having 20-40 minutes for myself in the morning before I start my day. On the weekends I like to take long, hot showers. My husband doesn’t like the water bill, but a nice steaming shower wakes me up and makes me feel vibrant.”

She also enjoys calling friends, especially friends in other cities and tries to build in social time with other adults each week. She said, “I work from home and it can be lonely so, once or twice per week I try to go to an event or invite someone for lunch for dinner. Just to maintain that connection.”

Many thanks to the talented Edwine Alphonse!

Sign up for Edwine’s amazing newsletter,  The Balanced Sheets and learn about her businesses Your Startup CPA and James Accounting. Follow her great adventure on LinkedIn. 

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About Edwine:

Edwine Alphonse, CPA is a finance leader and VP Controller at Houzz, with a career rooted in building and scaling finance and accounting organizations at high-growth and unicorn companies, including Ramp and Circle. She brings a thoughtful, people-first approach to financial transformation, building teams and processes that help companies grow with confidence and clarity.

Outside of work, Edwine is an entrepreneur, investor, founder of Your Startup CPA and the owner of James Accounting. She writes The Balanced Sheets, her newsletter where she shares practical insights on finance, leadership, and building sustainable businesses. A passionate advocate for financial inclusion and literacy for women, she is deeply committed to uplifting and supporting others through mentorship and board service with organizations aligned to her values.

Above all, Edwine is a proud mother of two amazing daughters and finds her greatest joy traveling the world and making memories with them.

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