“When I introduced play as a facilitator, it neutralized the power dynamics. And it created a sense of psychological safety so everybody could participate in a more holistic and honest way. And that was when the light bulb went off for me. Play helps us create a sense of emotional openness. Just like the way my children play, it creates alternative rules and lowers the stakes for risk taking,” said Jyoti Jani, Author, Facilitator and Organizational Behavior Expert.
Workplaces can feel like minefields for mothers. Theres’s social risk to sharing your opinion, seeking support or suggesting new ways of doing things. Especially in traditional industries or roles, where women are underrepresented. But candid, heartfelt communication, whether that’s with your boss, colleagues, or customers is often the key to innovation. Not to mention, career fulfillment and effectiveness. To get there, we have to overcome the rampant disconnection that plagues most org cultures. Consider starting where it all began, with your desire to play.
Sadly, It’s Common to Feel Voiceless at Work
Jyoti began her career as an engineer at Boeing, the world’s largest aircraft manufacturer. She explained, “I saw a lack of collaboration, a lot of competitiveness and all sorts of things that come from a scarcity mindset.” She became fascinated by human element in organizational life.
She added, “I decided early in my career to go back to school and completed my master’s in organizational design. I went from being a physical scientist to a social scientist.” This exploration led to her professional shift and ultimately, her new book: Creating Culture: Empowered Leadership for Systems Change.
The Quality of Your Work Relationships Matter
Community connection is a known antidote to stress. And when colleagues become the friends who complete your sentences, it’s an incredible gift. However, that type of workplace kinship is still rare. Research giant Gallup uses the question, “do you have a best friend at work?” in their studies to assesses everything from satisfaction and culture, to intent to stay. So, how do you foster better connections when most workers are burned out?
But We Can Learn to Communicate Better
Jyoti said, “Communication is the bedrock of everything humans do together regardless of the context. Whether it’s in my marriage, parenting role as a manager or teammate, communication is really at the heart of everything.” During her years in corporate life, she observed how lack of communication exacerbated problems. “It wasn’t until after I left corporate America that I realized how stressed out and anxious I was when I was there and that’s how most of the people there were.
Mitigate the Fear
Jyoti explained, “Typical leadership culture, whether we like to admit it or not is actually very fear driven. And using play is a is about creating a mindset shift.” So, how can we pull back from fear and regain confidence? She said, basically it’s dialing down the workplace and internal stress. “A lot of ways that people manage their stress is actually play. Like going for a walk, or other ways of getting into your body like yoga or dance.”
Embrace How Play Improves Communication
Jyoti specializes in play-based facilitation for leaders and teams. Often using inspirational tools like Lego bricks, paint sets and music she mixes herself. “As a facilitator, I noticed how using play shifted power dynamics. New engineers, young people that might have been invited into a manager only space to share their opinions, were very afraid to speak up. They’d be nervous like, ‘I want to say this thing, but I don’t know how to say it.’ There was a lot of nervousness.”
Recognize Play at Three Different Levels
Jyoti advocates playfulness at 3 levels, which she outlines in her book in more detail:
- The ‘we’ or the relational level of play
- The ‘all of us’ or systemic level of play
- Play at the individual level
She said, “As an individual you can encourage yourself to play and not just at work. Cultivating that practice of a playful mindset in your life gives you the capacity to overcome fear of the unknown.” Brilliant! As we face an uneven economy and social climate, the strain can seep into our professional lives. But there is a better way.
Stop Searching for Certainty
Leadership is a critical part of organizational culture and improving outcomes, regardless of the conditions. Jyoti said, “From a neuroscience standpoint, overcoming fear is the foundation upon which you have to build as a leader. If you don’t have the embodied capacity to navigate discomfort, then you can’t really access the group and systemic levels of play.” A lot of leaders lose touch with how their own wellbeing contributes to stale group interactions.
Include Other Voices Early in Your Meetings
Jyoti shares strategies that can help reset your group dynamic. “In a lot of meetings it might not be until 30 or 40 minutes in that people have a chance to ask questions but most people are already checked out by then.” Why yes, we’ve all been through those dry meetings where no one is communicating or connecting. She explained, “Studies show that if you give people a chance to bring their voices into the space within the first 5 or 10 minutes of a meeting, they’re more likely to be engaged through the whole hour. So, start with a question that’s not directly at the heart of what your meeting is about as a warmup.”
Break the Ice
Jyoti said, “Some people get a weird feeling about ice breakers but it’s to get people’s bodies warmed up and create a sense of connectedness. So, have a great question ready. It doesn’t have to be something people spend a long time answering. You can ask people to share something about themselves and give them a minute to think about what they want to share, either in the chat or with their voice. That immediately helps create a sense of we’re in it together.”
Bring Curiosity to Your Problems
When I asked what we can do as individuals, Jyoti said, “If you notice you’re feeling overwhelmed or anxious about a project or something on your to do list, approach it with a playful lens. Like, ‘how might I do this differently?’ or ‘how might I break up this unmanageable task into smaller chunks?’ Invite a sense of wonder back into your life. Give yourself permission to be like a kid.”
Start Playing In or Outside of Work More Often
What prevents us from applying that playful lens in our daily life? Typically, for moms it’s the great time crunch. But there are ways to resist stress-induced joylessness. Jyoti said, “Play with your kids.” Of course our kids love that and play not only fosters more creative thinking, it helps reduce the physical strain of ongoing stress.
So, start bringing play back into your life today. It’s available to you when interacting with your kids, solving problems, managing others or hosting meetings in your professional life.
Many thanks to the talented Jyoti Jani!
Check out her delightful new book: Creating Culture: Empowered Leadership For Systems Change and follow her great adventure on her website, and Linked In.
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About Jyoti:
Jyoti Jani has been designing and delivering people and culture programming since 2011.
With a background as an engineer, learning and development strategist, and systems thinker, Jyoti has developed expertise in cultivating creativity, communication, and cultural transformation across diverse industries. Her journey began by addressing knowledge transfer, employee engagement, and participative strategic planning where she leveraged play and creativity to unlock innovation and emotional intelligence in teams.
As the author of Creating Culture: Empowered Leadership for Systems Change, Jyoti provides actionable frameworks for leaders who want to reshape their workplaces into thriving ecosystems. Drawing on her unique perspective as a woman of color and global leader, Jyoti integrates research, storytelling, and real-world insights to help organizations move from chronic misalignment, avoidance and stress to brilliance.
Jyoti has facilitated executive retreats, leadership workshops, and immersive creative experiences for organizations like Boeing, Microsoft, and the Gates Foundation. She has also collaborated with community-focused initiatives like Y-WE (Young Women Empowered) to build responsive systems that prioritize trust, equity, and impact.
Whether on a stage as a keynote speaker, in a studio as a DJ at KEXP, or at a corporate offsite, Jyoti inspires leaders to reimagine how they connect, create, and communicate, using embodied and artful methods. Her work invites people to reclaim their agency, embrace play, and build systems where everyone can thrive.
