“We have to be courageous because we deserve rest and our bodies deserve recovery. It’s really difficult when society puts different value on us based on what we’re able to produce. Whether that’s how much income we can bring in or how much we can do for our families.” Dr. Lucy Lomas, OB/GYN Physician and Holistic Health and Wellness Expert.
It’s common knowledge that stress is bad, not only for our moods but underlying physical health. Women are at greater risk for most stress-related illness. Like autoimmune disorders, anxiety and depression. We also tend to feel the damage in real time but our to-do lists are ridiculously long and most of us can’t reduce our workloads fast enough. So, what can we do to manage proactive wellbeing amidst the demands of real life?
Your Fulfillment Matters
After many years caring for women’s health in hospital settings, Lucy started her own practice. In light of the growing crisis for women’s health, especially maternal health, she wanted to expand her impact by combining obstetric and gynecological care with wellness. She said, “my philosophy is to encourage women and individuals to prioritize their physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. It’s about whole-body, holistic health.”
The US is among the least parent-friendly countries in the world and overwork is the norm here. Our careers are not only connected to our identities but the infrastructure we often need to raise kids and survive. So, it’s hard to untangle internal versus external pressure. Then of course there’s the small matter of honoring lifelong hopes and dreams. And doing so, in parallel with household, childcare, and possibly eldercare responsibilities. When I asked Lucy, ‘how do you talk to women about the cost of running at full speed to our health? She said, “I struggle with this myself so, I don’t have a perfect answer. But I can tell you how I try to hold a vision for my health, family, community and business, and make steps towards that.”
Set Your Pace to the Speed of Momentum
It’s not always possible to reach the result you want in the time frame you imagine. The current macro climate, including social and economic conditions, do not help. Lucy said, “I’m hopeful that I am making progress even as I am still building. Whether I’m in restoration mode, versus a stride, a run or a leap, I just hope I can continue to make progress.”
What if you break your efforts into stages? A seasonal lens can help contextualize your short- and long-term objectives. Moving through activities based on their levels of maturity, your caregiving season and available time is a powerful way to reframe what you need ‘right now’ versus a year from now.
Acknowledge Use of Your Emotional Reserves
We’re always managing capacity, energy, caregiving and access to resources. Like discretionary time, support, and money. It won’t look the same from month to month, especially if we’re managing sudden shifts to what our kids and family members might need.
Lucy said, “I have to be the emotional support system for my kids and encourage them. Am I the only one who feels unbelievably drained trying to get them to pull their pants up and brush their teeth every day?” We discussed that sometimes we forget how much energy and emotional range parenting takes in addition to our other roles.
Track Different Sources of Information Over Time
The stakes and physical conditions for emotional wellbeing rise during intense hormonal changes for women. Yes, like pregnancy and postpartum but also perimenopause and menopause. Begin to assess your many sources of information about how you feel, for example:
– How you feel in your body and any changes
– Your emotional state and differences in your typical mood or demeanor
– Data from your wearable devices or apps that monitor aspects of your health
– Results from your annual physical and any changes over time
– Expert guidance from health care practitioners based on all of the above
Prioritize Small Actions that Serve Long-Term Health
Our paths to better health span, to improve quality of life not only longevity as we age, begins now. Lucy said, “Think about how you want your 70-, 80-, 90- or 100-year-old body to function and what is one step to move towards that ideal version of yourself? I imagined my 70-year-old soul as a really strong lean glowing version of myself. If I really allow myself to embody that version, I think, ‘what kind of food do I need to put into my body now to nurture that version?’ It’s definitely more green vegetables and fewer processed foods. ‘What type of movement do I need to be working towards?’ ‘Do I need more rest?’ ‘What am I doing to build my strength?’ Also, making sure I do what I can to maintain my balance.”
Visualize Your Wellbeing Destination
Countless studies show that happiness, is centered around having healthy, long-term relationships. Lucy added, “I’m also focused on building strong relationships and connections with my family, children, neighbors and with my friends. And certainly, having more fun so you I do what I can to imagine that version of me and what that looks and feels like so I know that’s where I’m going.”
Deeper Career Fulfillment as Another Form of Self-Care
Lucy previously shared her story of burnout working long hospital shifts during the height of the pandemic. When I asked Lucy, what self-care looks like in her life right now? She said, “In addition to taking care of myself and doing what I can for my kids and family, I’ve been working with community organizations to run wellness programs. It’s one of the ways I get to express my creativity. I just hosted a wellness workshop today that was all about nutrition for our elderly population and the joy and energy was amazing! It was just a reminder, this is why I do this.” Beautiful!
Many thanks to the talented Dr. Lucy Lomas MD!
Learn about Lucy’s medical practice on her website. And follow her great adventure on Instagram and LinkedIn.
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About Dr. Lucy Lomas:
Dr. Lucy Lomas MD is an expert in women’s health and wellness. She is leading a community-owned wellness center located in Roxbury that prioritizes the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being of patients and healthcare workers. Lucy is a board-certified OB GYN physician with over 15 years of clinical experience. She serves as the director of community, health and wellness for the New England Medical Association, a network of black physicians. She graduated from the University of Southern California for Medicine (2009) and Biomedical engineering (2004). Lucy loves creating joyful experiences for her children, family and friends.
